Mother's Day weekend, heartbreak and other fiascos

The title may be a little misleading...Mother's Day weekend was not a fiasco.  I had a fabulous girls day out at the Canon Falls Winery.  KC (designated driver for the way back), Deb (KC's mom), Steph and I had a blast.  Well, at least I did, hope they did too!
Mother's Day was beautiful weather-wise and we woke up to find that our very pregnant Kuno had finally had her litter of kittens (still trying to determine if there are 8 or 9, but know for sure there are 5 orange/orange & whites & 3 dark - either black or tortise). We had a great visit with my mother-in-law and Darryl.  I have been very blessed in that area.  I heard from all of my beautiful children and my husband cooked a fabulous dinner.
Yesterday, I spent the day breaking my own heart.  Funny, when I was younger, I would have said that only a romantic interest could break your heart.  Since then I have had my heart broken by too many other people and things. Sometimes the heartbreaks were not meant that way...they just happened. The death of my father-in-law, tough decisions that I made as a parent, tough decisions that I made as a daughter, other tough decisions I have had to make, the worst of which turned out to be mistakes I made that hurt people I loved.
Yesterday, it was a tough decision and the necessary actions to carry out that decision that was breaking my heart. The story (no matter how etched it is in my heart) is still not mine to tell.  This was not supposed to be my responsibility,  I shouldered it and I need to learn to live with that - rather than blaming others for putting it on me.
It could be years before I find out the aftermath of my decision...what happens next is out of my hands and out of my control.  I may never know if it turned out to be the right decision, if I could have made a different decision that would turn things a different way.  I hope and pray that the troubled young woman walking around with a piece of my heart finds her way.  Not for the sake of me and my heart, but for her, because she needs to know that "She is good enough, she is smart enough and gosh darn it, people like her"!*
Part of the plan yesterday required me to drive to Watertown, WI and back.  It was there that my car was dented by an elderly woman - not a lot of damage, but enough, especially when the car is a 2009 purchased just under a year ago.  It was a particular fiasco, because I could see she was going to do it (I was sitting in the car in a parking lot at the time) but had no way to prevent it.  The woman was attempted to pull into an angled parking spot from the wrong direction and connected with the driver's side door and front quarter panel.  It's a good thing she wasn't going very fast, even so it's disconcerting to have someone drive into you while you watch.
I took the day off work today to recover from the long drive yesterday and deal with the car.  Unfortunately, by early afternoon I was suffering from an intestinal issue and wound up mostly dealing with a coma-like sleep or the bathroom.  Oh, well *
*I am not a big fan Stuart Smalley (though he has made me smile on occasion) or Mr. Franken, and I used to make fun of the "affirmation" when he was on SNL.  Since then, however, that particular mantra has found a special place in my journey.

Theresa Comer
"The mind is like a parachute, it works best when open"

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burning bridges

I recently have had a couple of conversations about people burning their bridges.  It's made me think and wonder...have I burnt my bridges with anyone?  When and why?  How?
I can actually think of a couple of people who might say that I had done just that.  An early employer that I let down badly when I was young and foolish...a "friend" or two whose loss are not a particular tragedy.  Maybe some others.  All of the instances I could think of occurred well before I hit 30 years of age, most in my early 20s or teens.
I can think of a couple of times when I had the opportunity to burn bridges and cause ill will since I have turned 30.  Each time I decided it was not worth the negative energy and bad karma.  I took the time and made an effort to mend the rift and leave the relationship on congenial terms.
I tried to think of people who had burned all of their bridges with me, maybe I am just too much of a sap...there are a few, very few and I guess it depends on how you define it too.  I can't think of anyone whom I couldn't either be polite to or just ignore if the need arose (as long as they returned the courtesy of either being polite back or ignoring me altogether).  There is a small group of people who I can honestly say I would never trust and would never shed any tears over, but I don't actively wish them ill.
It's never been a secret that my own mother is one of the people who falls into category of people I would never trust and do not miss having as an active part of my life.  There was a point at wish I may have even wished her ill (who am I trying to kid, I know there was), but time has passed and while there is no regret, there are no longer hard feelings on my side, just a resigned knowledge that this is the way things are and will always be.
Maybe anyone under a certain age should be given a free pass, so that their bridges remain in tact until they have reached the age of understanding and can make the choice from a point of experience and understanding to burn a bridge or try to mend it?

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Blind Side

I didn't want to see the movie...really, not my style.  Watched it tonight, anyway.  It actually is an awesome movie and story.
And I just can't help myself...I REALLY like Sandra Bullock.  Unlike so many other stars, she SEEMS so real.  Maybe that is just part of being a fabulous actress or maybe she has some other quality that transcends the screen.  Sorry, I am just not smart enough to figure it out.
Anyway, in the past week or so I saw more new (to me) movies than usual: Bounty Hunter, enjoyed it. Nightmare on Elm Street, okay, I am just not a horror movie fan any longer.  Shutter Island, enjoyed it, but it was intrinsically disturbing.  Blind Side, wow, blown away by how much I enjoyed it. 
Absolutely WOULD not watch "Lovely Bones"...I read the book and while it is REALLY good, I can go to the same place emotionally without the help of fiction. *Kind of how I felt about "The Deep End of the Ocean".
I am on the fence about "New Moon"...I have read all of the Twilight books, they make great fantasy but the relationship(s) are SO unhealthy and since they are targeted at a young audience that bothers me.  I prefer to stick to adult authors portraying unhealthy relationships!

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